Getting to the Root of Your Issues

***To catch up for my 365blessings: I am blessed with my own home, 4 beautiful children and air conditioning in this oppressive heat!!!***

   I have been spending the better part of today searching Missing Money websites trying to see if there is any unclaimed money out there for me or my extended family. This has undoubtedly led to my search for me and my husband's distant relatives. 

     Why does knowing your deceased relatives matter? Anyone could answer that. Because then you know where you come from,right? Right. But it's more than that. Knowing who your people are means knowing who you are too- or more importantly why you are. Why you are moody, or red haired or in love with the idea of skydiving,lol.
     When I was in high school I had to do a paper about the roots of Halloween. All the studying and research began getting me more and more curious about the Wiccan religion though I was taught from a young age to stay away from all forms of sorcery and divination.Still, it was becoming strangely appealing to the point where one book I had  had a section on spells you can do at home and I found myself struggling to not want to "just try one." I returned the book to the library and never gave it another thought. Years later after I was married I told my mm about this...turns out there was actually a practicing witch in our family! Though witchcraft is not genetic, the spirits in a family can be handed down unwillingly just as easily as freckles or curly hair. Knowing your roots can unlock the mysteries of so many so called diseases and ailments.I often wonder how many diseases people just write off like depression and alcoholism aren't really just spirits passed down through the generations? What do you think?
 

Finding Your Gift

  

 

Growing up, I have had friends and family that have such obvious gifts from God, it almost seems unfair. The artists I know have been blessed with such unity between their eyes,hands and imaginations it's like they inherited God's mind when He created this world. The musicians I know are usually self taught and can play anything on just about any instrument whether or not they can even read music! Then there are those blessed with the true gift of gab-they always know the correct thing to say to the right person at just the right time. I used to be jealous because it seemed God had forgotten me in the gift giving department. Sure I've been told more than a few times that my writing and poetry were amazing, but it didn't seem like that to me. To me it seemed my writing was entertaining at best, but not awe inspiring or moving as were the gifts of those around me.

     Today as an adult I can say I know this to be completely untrue. God makes no mistakes and He has created each of us with something that can be used of service to others. I believe that is the key to finding your gift- not looking for that amazing something someone else has that you don't. This is self serving. Or trying to feign a gift you don't have in order to get rich off it quickly. Self- serving again. It is purely my sole opinion that until a person can humbly and consciously (or subconsciously) determine that whatever they" just happen to do well" will be used towards the service of others and the glorifying of the Lord, they may never truly be able to recognize their own gift. This saddens me- because I've been there...some days
I still am.

     I don't want to leave this world being just another anonymous face in a sea off homo sapiens. But I don't want the world to mourn the loss of my life because I was famous for absolutely nothing of substance either. When my time comes and my writings and a few pics left behind are the only vivid connection people have to my being here, I want the world to be able to say without a shadow of a doubt: First and foremost she lived to serve God, then she lived to serve others. Heck, make my epitaph read, "Here lies Maria. She lived to serve."

     Mark 10:41-45:

 ^{41 -45}When the other ten heard of this conversation, they lost their tempers with James and John. Jesus got them together to settle things down. "You've observed how godless rulers throw their weight around," he said, "and when people get a little power how quickly it goes to their heads. It's not going to be that way with you. Whoever wants to be great must become a servant. Whoever wants to be first among you must be your slave. That is what the Son of Man has done: He came to serve, not to be served—and then to give away his life in exchange for many who are held hostage."

     That is my gift- I love to serve. I can't draw a straight line, move people to a tearful ovation with my singing or playing of any instrument; I can barely sew,can't  fix things or build things or speak eloquently enough to move stadiums of crowds to do my bidding,lol, but I can and LOVE to serve. Ask anyone who knows me why I love Christmas. It's a chance to bring a smile to someone else's face. I have been known to randomly clean various rooms of people's houses when I was younger, just to surprise them while visiting them with my mom. I would mow lawns for the elderly for free in summer, I even offered my winter coat as a pillow of sorts to my high school tormentor once when his leg was broken. I love to love people. It feels SO GOOD to have people know they are loved. Yes, I believe this is my gift. And this is my blessing for which 

I am thankful for today. I am blessed to not be arrogant or self serving.

And in the spirit of this wonderful gift, I am have my first GIVEAWAY!

This week's FREE GIVEAWAY is my own personal copy of the book Jesus Freaks:Martyrs.

     This is one of my favorite books, for it tells many true stories of men,women and even children who refused to back down from their Ultimate Devotion and ended up offering the most precious gift they had- their lives.

     This moving book can be yours. Simply leave a comment, and you are automatically entered. Additional entries can be yours for the price of a "like" on Facebook, or a "Follow" on Twitter. Giveaway ends 8/3/2011 @10pm EST. Winner will be chosen at random. Odds of winning based on number of entries received.  Any questions, feel free to email me: just click the Gleaning from the Fields tab and you are on your way! Good Luck!
 

365 Blessings part II

   

 

               Today I am thankful for the blessing of a brand new bed.

     For over 4 years my husband and I have been sleeping on a king sized bed with busted box springs beneath it.He has tried fixing them and tying them...but to no avail. This bed has so many memories, good and bad, attached to it.... and it is so hard to say goodbye to it-if for no other reason than it was the bed we picked out together to lie in as husband and wife. It was the bed we brought each of our babies to, to nurse and co sleep in, and the best feature ( once your body adjusted to that ache and twinge in your back and neck,lol) was that it was impossible to go to bed angry and separated from each other because of the way it dipped, we'd always be forced to roll towards each other in the center!

     Around tax time last year we researched and shopped from store to store with all 4 bored to tears children in tow and finally agreed on the one- and God bless the delivery men that unloaded that monster, piece by piece, into our tiny country house! Until hubby found the time to assemble it, it was placed in the living room, against the front window- blocking out all sunlight for a year,lol. Well, we finally hauled it up to the new room and my wonderful man put it together in 30 minutes flat! It is even bigger and more beautiful assembled in our humbly bare room than the showroom with all its pricey add ons surrounding it.

     Because of of its broke down nature, and the many heartbreaking memories of an old natured spouse that were also attached to the old bed, I'm finding it easier to embrace the new bed...though the happy memories of the old one still linger. I'm quickly learning though that stuff is not what is precious, but the memories that can't be broken down,rusted or taken from you. They may one day be hidden from the forefront of your mind, but they are always there. And I look forward to making new memories (and little blessings  ) in this wonderful new place rest.
 

365 Blessings

   

  I don't know about you, but I am beyond sick and tired of days where it seems like nothing is going right and it's just one crisis after another ALL DAY LONG. This has been going on for me for almost a week now and it's getting reeeeeal old reeeeal fast. So to combat this assault on my well being, I am challenging myself ( and any one else inspired to do the same) to come up with one blessing in your life per day for 1 year. This way, even on days when I have nothing to blog about, I have a blessing to praise about! And you can't tell me 365 is too many.If the Lord's mercies are new every morning, then that sounds like a daily opportunity to praise Him for being blessed!

     So here it goes! Day 1 of a year of blessings. beginning on July 25th,2012!  

     TODAY I AM BLESSED TO HAVE MY SALVATION. I HAVE BEEN BAPTIZED OF BOTH THE WATER AND OF THE SPIRIT. I HAVE ACCEPTED THE GIFT OF SALVATION THAT JESUS CHRIST PURCHASED FOR ME 2,000 YRS AGO WHEN HE PAID WITH HIS LIFE. I AM NOT ASHAMED OF HIM, MY BELIEFS OR THIS GOSPEL OF TRUTH. I MAY FAIL DAILY AT BEING WHO I WAS MEANT TO BE, BUT HIS BLOOD COVERS A MULTITUDE OF MY SINS. AGAIN, HIS COMPASSION, HIS LOVE FOR ME- IT  IS NEW EVERY SINGLE MORNING. HE IS THE LOVER OF MY SOUL AND I AM THE LOVER OF HIS WAYS. UNTIL MY LAST BREATH WHEN I GO TO BE WITH HIM IN HEAVEN, I WILL THANK HIM FOR BLESSING ME WITH ACCEPTANCE INTO HIS FAMILY AND DECLARE THAT JESUS CHRIST ALONE IS GOD.
 

Cake Year Round!

      I was an only child for 11 years and can vividly remember the loneliness and sadness that comes with hours of playing Barbie alone or playing catch with a small rubber ball and a door. Granted, I learned how to properly handle myself around adults sooner than most children, my vocabulary became impressive and maturity was a given...and let's not downplay the joy of doting grandparents and a spoiling mother! But still, I didn't have 1 friend who was a singleton like me. In fact 3 of my closest friends had many siblings- one had 3 sisters and a brother, one had 2 sisters and a brother and the other had 2 sisters. School friends told stories of the eternally cool older brothers, annoying little brothers or sisters and flawlessly idolized older sisters. I used to dream of being a middle child; to be blessed with siblings who look up to you and siblings you can learn from would have been such a treat! But I was the firstborn and the only until 1992 when my fervent prayers for a little sister ended with a flaxen haired little brother. We were inseparable (not always by choice,lol) but I did everything possible I could to be the best big sister I could be.

     So having been both a singleton and a sibling for many years I know both sides of this fence very well.....and I would love to know at what point in our country children went from being a blessing to a bother?

     I myself only have 4 children: a son who just turned 4 and 3 daughters ages 8,5½ and 1½. To me, this is not a lot or too many. Yet I can't tell you the number of times I've heard one of these 10 top phrases:

10.I don't know how you do it! My ___(usually 1 or 2) just wear me out! (sorry to hear that- have you tried cardio?)

9.Nope, we had our 2 and WE ARE DONE!(um, I never asked...)

8.Someone needs to tell you where babies come from!(Really?Cuz, I think I pretty much got a handle on the subject,clearly.)

7.Are they all yours?!(Why yes they are!Are yours?)

6.Are they all from the same father???(Absolutely!And they came after our wedding!How about you?!)

5.Are you done yet?(just like these questions...apparently not!)

4.You trying to be like that Duggar family??(One could only pray to be so blessed and normal.)

3.How do you afford all them kids?(How do you afford all them cigarettes?)

2.(pointing to my 2nd oldest) Is she adopted?(no,why?were you interested?)

1.You must have your hands full!(1.To match my heart./ 2.You must have your head empty!)

     At first I would politely just smile and walk away or give a nervous laugh. Then I started actually answering these repetitive queries several times a day every day. Now I am in this half stage between angry/defensive and head shaking pity. I mean really, think whatever you want about me or my family but have the decorum to either keep it to yourself or at the very least connect your synapses and know not to blurt out whatever pops into your narrow mind in front of my children. (Sorry, there's that angry/defensive I warned you about).I'm not saying bigger families are better or even that smaller families are better.There is NO BETTER. There is only what works for you and me.

     For our family the belief that many children are a blessing and a gift runs deep. The practice of pray now, plan later means a lot. And many hands make work light....well, we're working on that,lol, they are still small. But I can tell you one thing. Not one child in this household has ever been an        " oops baby". Whether my husband and I were in agreeance at the time or not, each child was planned,prayed for and loved beyond human understanding. Every 2 years a family portrait has been taken and every 2 years we look back at the last picture and can easily see a space where a family member was missing and are so grateful to God that space was filled the following year or so. 

     I knew my husband and I were finally on the same page the day he said to me,"It's not a matter of whether or not we are done or if people think we have too many children. It's a matter of there is a member of this household missing, we just haven't met them yet".

     So now you know where I stand and my feelings on the subject...what are yours? (Keep it clean and respectful or it will be removed,thank you.)

some good website reading:
little emperors
Life Without Children
American Prejudice
LOK
The Breeders' Cup