I am very curious to find the very first minute, the single point in time where a person's word stopped meaning a thing. That very second the very first human being went back on their word. If I had to venture a guess, it would be the moment God laid down the ground rules of Eden for Adam and Eve...and like a couple of 5 year olds in a candy store they nodded deafly to all the Lord had said because they were just chomping at the bits to go hog wild thru the Garden. The very moment that Eve compromised what she KNEW to be true for what she HOPED was true is when I believe man made promises carried very little weight anymore.
The reason I bring this all up is because I live in a town where cheating is as blatantly common as picking a flick outta the Redbox machine at Walmart, but is rarely openly confronted unless it's during a drunken attack from the jilted spouse to their philandering counterpart. And it makes me sick, because everybody gossips and whispers about Mr.So and So Barfly getting with Ms. or Mrs. Hot Mess Train Wreck. There are laughs, nonchalant head shakes and "oh well that's life" shrug offs. And the worst part is, no one is gonna expose the cheaters they know about because the cheaters usually have betrayal blackmail on their friends and neighbors as well----classic case of "you keep quiet, so will I". To this I say:
" 'TIL DEATH DO YOU PART' DOES NOT MEAN 'TIL YOU'RE SICK TO DEATH OF YOUR PARTNER!' "
Anyone who knows me knows I hate a liar and I can usually spot one a mile away unless they are reeeeal good, but I'm gonna call it like I see it. I DO NOT CARE whether you had a lavish shin dig or a backyard BBQ for your wedding...if you took those vows it was TO your mate BEFORE God. Oh, don't believe in God? Ok, then why do most weddings have a clergy, a Bible or whatever religious book you tote around, a phrase somewhere along the lines of "before God and these people" or "What God has joined together"??? Oh, didn't have anything like that at all in your wedding???Ok, here's a thought: Why'd did you fork out any money at all for food, rings, a party, anything at all if you didn't mean what you said to the other person??
Not many people know my personal personal life because that's just how I am. I protect mine...wrong or not. I can bad mouth them if need be, but not you. I hurt when they hurt- that's how I know I love them. But it's time to stop bandaging a festering wound, so I'm cautiously airing it out a bit....I've had my own brush with infidelity and finding out about it years later has hurt and nearly destroyed me as badly as if I found out the second it happened. And I will DEFY anyone to try to convince me it isn't cheating if there was no sex involved ( and there wasn't). I don't understand why cheaters don't just leave? Why keep their dirty little secrets? What have you to gain? Or are they just that selfish they'd rather destroy a family then die to self?
I could take this tirade on for hours, believe me, but I won't. Bottom line, if you have no intentions of being faithful or even think you are even remotely incapable of keeping your word to your spouse, do us all a favor a don't make them your spouse to begin with. I can guarantee you most people would rather be eternal bachelors/bachelorettes than somebody's ex whatever. And for those that choose not to walk away from a cheating spouse, don't think yourself odd for waking up crying or suspiciously checking up on them out of the blue years down the line. Once burned, twice shy....and you'll get through it with strength from the Most High.It rhymes, but it's true. There is hope, there is healing...you will smile again.